The day your child starts mainstream primary school is a big step in their lives and the life of your family. If your child has additional needs there are some simple, practical things you can do as a parent to prepare the way and set them up for success. Here’s our guide on how you can support your child to thrive as they start mainstream primary school.
Many parent carers express how starting mainstream primary school wasn’t only a big step for their child, but a huge step for them as a parent too. The routine you have been used to up until now is about to change, and this can bring all sorts of emotions with it.
Perhaps your child has been at home with you until this point, or settled in their Early Years nursery, where the staff knew them well, and knew how to support them best. It’s absolutely natural to experience some worry and fear around how your child will feel about being in a new environment with new people and routines. The more you can support yourself beforehand to feel more comfortable with the idea, the smoother their transition into school will be.
Preparation begins well before your child transitions to mainstream school and giving yourself a few months before they start their new school means you’ll have plenty of time and space and deal with whatever comes your way. You might find it helpful to write out any worries in a journal or share with a friend to start to understand why you might have these concerns. In some cases, you might discover that they can be addressed by taking practical steps in advance.
You might already be part of a forum that supports parent carers with children with additional needs, and if not, this could be a useful time to join one. Sharing how you feel about your child starting mainstream school with other parents who have gone through similar experiences can be helpful, and they can often have plenty of good advice to offer you too.
The new school staff will want to get to know you and your child well before they begin school so they can begin planning for your child’s individual needs and put things in place to support you. If your child has a diagnosis, or your child’s pre-school setting has already identified a special educational need, letting the new school know this well in advance can help the school to plan ahead in terms of applying for extra funding, if applicable.
However, your child does not require a diagnosis to receive special educational needs (SEN) support, and as their parent you can help the school to understand your child and their particular needs before they start. For example, making an appointment to meet with your child’s class teacher and the school’s special educational needs coordinator (SENCO) is a great idea, and will set the tone for a positive, collaborative relationship that will continue to develop over the time your child is at school.
You might share with them a simple written document that clearly outlines all the main points you feel they need to know, and work together to develop an Individual Education Plan (IEP) if needed.
Regular communication with each other, like using a home-school diary or having an in-person check-in at the end of the day, will identify and address any needs in a timely manner allowing plans or additional support to be put into place.
The school will probably offer a transition day where your child can spend the morning or afternoon at school before they begin full time. However, you might also ask if your child can visit the school during a holiday or when it is less busy in order to get to know the space before this. Parent carers say that taking some video or photos of the rooms, playground, teachers and support staff so your child can familiarise themselves with these new spaces and faces before they start can be a good idea.
In your meetings with school staff, there will be time to ensure your child’s healthcare needs are covered whilst they are at school. You may have already seen the medical support policy when making your choice of school, and this is a good time to identify the named member of staff who has overall responsibility for it.
Staff may need to be trained to support your child or to recognise certain signs so that any action needed is taken promptly, so the more information they have from you to ensure that everyone feels confident to respond fully to your child’s healthcare needs, the better. If your child requires medication during the school day, it can be helpful to develop a clear plan with the school nurse and teachers to ensure this is stored and administered safely.
If you feel it would be helpful, you can request a ‘phased entry’ approach where your child begins by attending their new school for a limited number of hours to start with, building up to whole days over time.
Some children with additional needs find that having a safe, dedicated sensory space within the school environment can be really helpful, and you can ask if this is available as an option for when your child feels they need some calm and relaxation during the school day. There might be special objects that your child uses in order to manage their emotions too, like a particular blanket, favourite book or fidget toy, and you should explain to the school what these are in advance so staff can be as accommodating as possible.
In the months before school actually begins, there are some simple, practical ways that you and your child can prepare for their transition to a new environment.
Starting mainstream school will be an opportunity for your child to develop their independence. Before they start school, and when it feels appropriate, you might support them at home by encouraging them to practise useful self-care skills, like using the toilet on their own, washing their hands and getting dressed by themselves. If your child’s new school has a uniform, your child might find it helpful to practise getting dressed, putting on their shoes, and packing their school bag with items they have chosen themselves.
Preparing your child
You might use the photos you collected on your previous visits to the school to create stories that you tell each other. Taking a photo of your child (dressed in their new uniform, if they have one) and involving your child in these scenes can be a fun, creative activity to enjoy as a family before school term begins.
Other parent carers say that they were glad they spent time focusing on developing their child’s communication skills before they went to mainstream school so they were able to express their needs in the way that worked best for them. Roleplaying at home can also help to prepare your child for certain behaviours and situations, like turn-taking, asking to go to the toilet or making choices at lunchtime.
Scheduling in time to practise playing with other children is also a great opportunity for your child to develop their social skills before school begins, and can also be a very real way for them to learn how to express and manage their emotions when they feel sad or frustrated. Our article on Supporting a child who is non-verbal or mute to communicate might be useful.
Starting mainstream primary school will be a transition over time rather than a one-off event and with careful planning and partnership with the school staff, you can go a long way to ensuring that this new phase in your family’s life feels as smooth and relaxed as possible for everyone.