Having someone dependent on him was something Dan learnt from a young age, caring for his mum. This followed him to adulthood where he now cares for his wife, Nicci, and stepson who has autism.
The biggest challenge Dan has faced caring is the feeling he had to do it all alone. He always thought of himself as being able to hold it together and his childhood experience had made him sensitive to looking after his mental health. However, being on call 24-7 and “moving from one person’s crisis to another” led him to near breakdown.
Dan had never received a Carers Assessment despite caring since he was 5. His Carers Assessment from Carers First helped him secure a personal budget. He uses this for the gym as he admits “I haven’t been taking care of my health” and a cleaner. His childhood experience with his mum means a tidy house is extra important to him and helps him feel more in control.
He also was introduced to other carers like him by joining a monthly Carers First support group. Dan says, “It has helped me realise I’m not alone in the difficulties I’ve faced and there is help available.”
Dan says the support from Carers First has given him his life back.
“Talking to someone outside my situation made me realise how much my caring role was affecting my physical and mental health. I learnt that I could give myself permission to think of myself and I don’t have to feel guilty.”
Dan has now found more balance in his life and is thriving. He has time to see friends and has also been volunteering. Fittingly, he is training to be a Peer Facilitator to support other carers with mental health issues.
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